memedelene:

Sentence Starters based on Ron Swanson quotes,
Part 1

“We will get along just fine, though hopefully not too fine, because I am not looking for any new friends.”

“Is Star Wars the one with the wizard boy?”

“Creativity is for people with glasses who like to lie.”

“I’ll take that steak to go. Please and thank you.”

“I would rather bleed out than sit here and talk about my feelings for 10 minutes.”

“This is a flying robot that I just shot out of the sky when it tired to deliver me a package.”

“Why do people eat anything besides breakfast food?”

“There’s only one thing I hate more than lying: skim milk, which is water that’s lying about being milk.”

“Normally, if given the choice between doing something and doing nothing, I’ll do nothing. But I will do something if it helps someone else do nothing. I’d work all night if it meant that nothing got done.”

“He now has that look that only comes with the pride of labor. Or… He pooped. Either way, I’ve never been prouder.”

“The next thing you’ll want to do is ditch the terrier and get yourself a proper dog. Any dog under 50 pounds is a cat and cats are pointless.”

“I’ll represent myself as I do in all legal matters and livestock auctions.”

“Dear frozen yogurt, you are the celery of desserts. Be ice cream or be nothing.”

“I prefer quality over flash - that’s why I refuse to write my signature in cursive.”

“There’s been a mistake. You’ve accidentally given me the food that my food eats.”

“I believe luck is a concept invented by the weak to explain their failures.”

“I’ll do anything! I’ll watch a foreign film! I’ll talk to a man with a ponytail!”

“I am not a sore loser. It’s just that I prefer to win and when I don’t, I get furious.”

“I’ve never known what bangs are and I don’t intend to learn!”

“What’s cholesterol?”

“I’m going to break out of here, then I’m going to snap you in half.”

“There has never been a sadness not cured by breakfast food.”

“I’ve never been hungover. After I’ve had too much whiskey, I cook myself a large flank steak, pan fried and salted butter. I eat that, put on a pair of wet socks and go to sleep.”

“Live your life how you want, but don’t confuse drama with happiness.”

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